Process Benefits

Create Collaborative Leadership Styles
Create a Bully-Free
Create a Psychologically Healthy and Profitable Workplace and Contribution
Reduce the Destructive
Effects of Conflict
"Happiness" and Emotional
Intelligence (EI)

Print out and Score the LifePsych® Couples Checklist

"Self Above Service"

Based on superiority beliefs and decisions that put “self” above "the other" using Entitlement, Domination and the vanity of Withdrawal in a self-serving "authocratic" style.

"Service Beyond Self"

Based on beliefs of "self-respect" and respect for "the other" while courageously moving beyond self-interest toward a Connected, Cooperative, and Contributing "belonging" style.

Entitled versus Contributing Partners

Entitlement Over the Other versus Efforts to "Belong" With the Other



Views self as “all knowing” or “all powerful” and rules over the other.
(Ruling Entitlement)

Masterfully leads the relationship into the future with visionary thinking.
(Leading Contribution)

Arrogantly brags about own accomplishments as being superior to the other.
(Egotistical Entitlement)

Makes special efforts to invest in relationship beyond own self-interest.
(Benevolent Contribution)

Dictates and intimidates the other with a presumed sense of self-importance.
(Intimidating Entitlement)

Strives to respectfully persuade the other.
(Persuasive Contribution)


Creates special privileges for self and expects special treatment from the other.
(Status-seeking Entitlement)

Creates activity that promotes useful contributions to the relationship.
(Achievement-seeking Contribution)

Places self-centered interests ahead of consideration of the other.
(Self-centered Entitlement)

Creates activity the promotes a meaningful relationship.
(Task-centered Contribution)


Entitlement sum = _____                                       Contribution sum = _____






Dominating versus Cooperative Partners

Domination Over the Other versus Efforts to Cooperate Respectfully With the Other



Controls the other for the purpose of demonstrating power; or acts in a stubborn manner with the other.
(Power-seeking Domination)

Promotes the attitude for treating the other as an equal.
(Equality-seeking Cooperation)


Tries to control the other with the use of personal criticism.
(Critical Domination)

Works toward helping the other do better.
(Encouraging Cooperation)


Manipulates or maneuvers the other for self-serving advantage.
(Manipulative Domination)

Guides the other toward creating mutual relationship benefit.
(Collaborative Cooperation)


Resists cooperation or intentionally works against the other.
(Opposing Domination)

Seeks out ways to affirm the other.
(Affirming Cooperation)


Becomes quick to retaliate in moody and crabby ways toward the other.
(Revenge seeking Domination)

Seems to understand the importance of encouraging the other.
(Nurturing Cooperation)


Domination sum = _____                                       Cooperation sum = _____












Withdrawing versus Connected Partner

Withdrawals From the Other versus Efforts to Connect Trustfully With the Other



Seems indifferent to relationship related activities; withholds participation.
(Indifferent Withdrawal



Expresses positive energy toward relationship related activities.
(Enthusiastic Connection)

Acts as if cannot relate to the other or seems insensitive to the other.
(Insensitive Withdrawal)

Initiates efforts in response to the other.
(Responsive Connection)


Avoids using energy for ordinary relationship activity.
(Action suppressed Withdrawal)


Responds constructively and initiates action toward making the relationship better.
(Action expressed Connection)

Is hesitant to express thoughts and ideas to the other.
(Thought suppressed Withdrawal)

Assertively expresses ideas and thoughts to the other.
(Thought expressed Connection)


Avoids interacting with the other and/or uses substances to disconnected with the other..
(Detached Withdrawal)

Is friendly and voluntarily initiates friendly interactions with the other.
(Participating Connection)


Withdrawal sum = _____                                           Connection sum = _____




















Self Above Service (SAS)                                              Service Beyond Self (SBS)

Pre ____ Post ____                                                         Pre ____ Post ____                

     (Total of 3 Area Scores)                                                                                                     (Total of 3 Area Scores)  






Track Your Relationship Movements Over Time

(for yourself and "significant other")